Take it like a man
by Lacey99
Summary: After killing Sadiq Fahd.


Harm's apartment

Harm had finally regained most of his hearing so he could hear the knocking on his door from his spot in the bed. He'd tried to sleep, but thinking about Mac he had been twisting and turning for hours. He hurried out of bed and walked to the door, wondering if something was wrong with Mattie.

"Mac?" Harm could see her bloody swollen lip and opened the door wide to let her in.

"It's over." Mac walked into his apartment.

"What happened? I've been going crazy here wondering what was going on." Harm closed the door and followed her over to the kitchen aisle. "Let me get something to clean up that lip." He hurried to his bathroom to get his first aid kit.

Mac sat quiet as he fixed her lip, feeling the sting as he cleansed the small wound. "Mac, your shoulder?"

Mac shrugged a little as Harm pulled her shirt aside. "It's just a little bruise, it'll be fine."

"What happened?" Harm sat down beside her.

"I killed him." Mac shrugged again. "It's over."

Harm wanted to know more, but he decided not to push her to talk. "You shouldn't be alone tonight, Mac. Why don't you stay here?"

Mac nodded.

Harm leaned closer to her and put his hand on her cheek. "Hey, it's going to be okay."

Mac leaned in and kissed him, slowly at first then deeper. Harm was surprised at first, then he kissed her back. It was passionate and fast, leaving them tangled together in his bed.

When Mac woke up the next morning she was alone in bed, hearing Harm move around the kitchen she cursed inside as she wouldn't be able to sneak out without him noticing. The walk of shame it was then.

She hurried to dress before she silently walked down the few steps from his bedroom.

"Good, you're up. I made breakfast," Harm said from his spot by the kitchen isle.

Mac froze. "Ah.. eh... yeah, okay." She finally looked at him. "But I need to leave. I have a meeting."

Harm stood. " Oh, okay. Are you going in to work today?"

"I need to be at Langley by 0900, then I'll stop by JAG afterward," Mac explained.

"I'll see you later then," Harm said with a smile.

Mac hesitated. "About last night. I'm supposed to be dating Clay."

Harm darkened. "Are you saying that last night was a mistake?"

"Harm, I'm saying that it should never have happened. I'm in a relationship and I crossed a line," Mac said as she turned to leave. "God, I mess up everything."

"Mac, don't leave it like this," Harm pleaded. "Do you love him?"

Mac turned towards him. "I don't know what I'm feeling. This isn't me, Harm. I don't do this."

"Isn't it different when it's between us?" Harm wanted to know.

"Harm, I can't deal with this right now." Mac turned to leave again and this time she didn't look back.

Clayton Webb's apartment

One week later

Mac struggled to find the words as she looked at Clay. She wanted to explain her behavior, she wanted to confess what she had done, but the words seemed stuck inside her.

"It's okay, Sarah. I understand," Clay said before Mac had even spoken.

"It's not okay," Mac argued. "I've been acting like someone I'm not, and I need to apologize."

"You've been through a lot, Sarah. You're though, but you're only human. How about we agree to move on now?" Clay said and took her hand.

"I can't, Clay. There's more than just my behavior this week." Mac hesitated. "Clay, I slept with someone else."

Clay let go of her hand. "Oh?"

"It was straight after I killed Sadique Fahd. I'm not going to use that as an excuse, because I knew what I was doing and I could have stopped." Mac looked straight into Clay's eyes.

"But you didn't want to stop, did you?" Clay asked.

"No, I didn't. I've been awful to more people than you lately, but this is the worst Clay. I'm not a person who sleeps around, and my actions were so out of character. But I don't regret what happened." Mac hesitated. "Clay, I care about you, but I don't love you."

Clay nodded. "You love someone else? You love Harm?"

"I do." Mac stood. "I have to apologize to him too, I just hope he doesn't hate me."

Clay followed Mac to the door. "I guess this is goodbye then, Sarah."

"I'm truly sorry, Clay." Mac leaned in and hugged him. "Take care of yourself."

"You too, Sarah." Clay watched her go before he closed the door behind her.

Harm's apartment

That same night

Mac knocked on Harm's door, but there was no one opening, so she knocked again. She let out a sigh and cursed herself for not calling him first. She tried to knock a third time, this time harder. She turned when the door to the apartment next to Harm's opened.

"Hi, Mac. Harm's here," Mattie said.

"Hi Mattie. Can you let him know that I'm here?" Mac asked.

The girl disappeared inside and soon Harm appeared. "Hi," he said as he closed the door behind him and walked over to her. "We just finished dinner. There's some for you too if you're hungry?"

Mac shook her head. "No thank you. Can we talk?"

Harm opened the door to his apartment and motioned for her to step inside.

"I've done so much apologizing this week..." Mac said as she sat down on one of the bar stools in front of the kitchen aisle. "But this one is the most important."

"How are you?" Harm wanted to know.

"Better. I've been acting like someone I'm not. It's like the world didn't move fast enough for me." Mac hesitated as she took his hand. "I'm so sorry, Harm. I hope you can forgive me."

"Mac, what exactly are you apologizing for? Because we cleared the air at the office, and I understand why you've been acting like you have. It's not easy looking a man in the eyes and pull the trigger, it takes time to deal with it."

"I saw a therapist. I guess it helped." Mac shrugged. "It's over with Clay."

"Did you tell him..." Harm hesitated.

"I told him what I did. And I told him that I didn't love him and that I was in love with someone else," Mac tugged on Harm's hand. "I just hope I haven't messed up everything between us, Harm. It's been so weird since Paraguay, and finally it feels normal between us and then I mess it up again."

"You weren't alone, Mac. It takes two to do what we did." Harm offered a reassuring smile. "So, what now?"

"I've asked the Admiral for a TAD assignment in San Diego. I'll be gone for a month to help out at the DSO. They have a shortage of staff and too many inexperienced lawyers. It'll be good for me to focus on something else, and I'll come back more like myself hopefully."

Harm leaned in and kissed her. "Maybe when you get back we can figure out what to do with us?"

Mac smiled. "I'd like that." She stood. "Let's keep in touch, okay?"

"Of course," Harm took her hands in his. "Take care."

"I will." She kissed him and then let him go before she disappeared out the door.

Four weeks later

San Diego, California

Mac closed the last file and leaned back in her chair. Her last assignment at the DSO was officially over and the Admiral had granted her a weeks leave before she had to report back to JAG. Mac was pretty much ordered by the Admiral to take leave since JAG was so slow at the moment it was the perfect timing. Before she could change her mind she picked up the phone.

"Hi, it's Mac. Yeah, I'm doing great actually. Do you remember that place you were talking about? Yes, exactly. Would you be willing to lend it to me for a week? Really? That is amazing, Trish. Thank you so much. And thank you again for all those great dinners. They really made my stay here so much better. Yes, I'll stop by to get the key. Great, talk to you then." Mac hung up and smiled. The next week would be great.

A little while later she had made a second phone call and said her goodbyes to the DSO staff. It was time for her vacation to start.

Later that night

Burnett condo, Catalina Island

Mac was sitting by herself looking over the ocean, enjoying the quiet of the late night. After a stop by the Burnett home where she had been fed and given the key to their condo at Catalina island, and been given the key to one of the Burnett cars, she had driven out to where the ferries departed and soon she found herself on the island. The Burnett condo was spacious and overlooking the beach, and Mac knew instantly that her week would be perfect.

"So this is where you're hiding?"

Mac stood and walked over to the man of her dreams. "You made it."

"When a beautiful woman call and ask me to jump on a plane to spend a week with her at Catalina Island, I tend to get very resourceful."

Mac smiled and leaned in and kissed him. "Your Mom and Frank are amazing."

Harm wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close. "From what I hear they feel the same way about you."

Mac relaxed against him. "I promised them we'd stop by before we leave for D.C. I have to return the car and the key to the condo."

"So what's the plan?" Harm asked as he softly played with her hair.

"Nothing. We do nothing," Mac said with a contented sigh. "Eat, sleep, walk on the beach, maybe a short run, but nothing more."

Harm smiled as he released her. "Then that's what we'll do."

Mac took his hand and they started walking towards the condo. "How's JAG?"

"The same. Harriet and Bud sends their love." Harm took the key from her and opened the door to the condo. "My lady," he said as he held the door open. He reached for his bag and followed her inside. Mac closed the door and locked it behind them. "Harm, there's one more thing we'll be doing this week."

Harm put his bag down and focused on her. "I know, we need to talk."

Mac shook her head as she walked towards him. "No, that's not it." She put her arms around him and kissed him deeply. "Are you with me, sailor?"

Harm answered the question with a kiss and by moving her towards the bedroom.

The End


End file.
